Sunday, July 29, 2007

Child Anger Managment

"Angry outbursts, uncontrolled tempers that are physically acted out, and the inability to explain what caused the behavior/anger could possibly be signs that the child has or at one time had psycho motor seizures.

If that is the case, while he may have outgrown the seizures, the behaviors initialized by them could and would become a behavior pattern if they went unchecked.

The interesting thing about psycho motor seizures is that they often go undiagnosed, though in the last ten years or so they have grown to be more readily recognized within the medical community.

First of all, let me say that if this child's parents are unwilling or unable to deal with the child's anger/behavior, the child is very lucky to have someone interested enough to look into how to work with him. Whether you feel you achieve any success or not, that child will know that someone saw the good in him... and someday, somehow, it will make a difference for him.

Different things work for different kids. Watch the child and see if you can pick out things that are 'positive' in him. Look for things he likes, simple things such as a certain classroom activity he likes, maybe erasing the blackboard, or taking notes to the office for you. You can use these things as tools with him.

Start easy.

Making his achievements too hard will only frustrate him and make him feel that he cannot accomplish what you are asking. Say he likes taking notes, etc. to the office, for example. Make a chart up for him for one week periods. On the chart, make goals for each day for him to achieve. (ie. finishing work, listening when instruction is being given, working quietly at his desk, staying on task, and thinking about what he is doing or saying.

In school, these goals can be set for each subject) Set the same goals for each day of the week and tally them up at the end of the week. What do you do with the checkmarks of successes?

That is where you use the 'tools'.

The things you know he likes. At first, make it easy. If he isn't able to accomplish enough to get the 'reward' then he most likely will quit trying. (it could be the BIG X for the day, and if he gets three out of five days with the BIG X, he gets to take the notes to the office the next week, or do the board erasing, or get the bag of M&M's, or whatever).

It is important that you make it so that he does have to try, and also that it is possible for him, that is where your knowledge of him will have to guide you. You want him to be pleased that he can succeed. When he behaves improperly, explain to him that the behavior was inappropriate.

Go over exactly what he did or said, and guide him through how he could have behaved appropriately. After a time (week, two weeks) when you feel he comprehends, you will go over a poor behavior and then ask him to tell you how he might have behaved more appropriately.

The truth of the matter is, he really doesn't know why he is doing these things. He hasn't had the instruction to know what it is that he should do, so how can we expect him to know how to explain himself.

He may know his behavior is wrong, but he may not know what his options are when it comes to his actions/behavior. What we can do is teach him new options, and set goals for him to help him achieve success.

When he has a week in which he does not get three out of five days with the "BIG X", he needs to be able to look at that week and physically see where he missed getting his checkmarks for the days."

This is article is by

Jamie Sullivan

Author of Child Anger Revealed

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